Traditions:
We all have them. Some of us even have the same ones. This is especially true for this time of year as Christians prepare to celebrate Easter. Lent is full of traditions. There’s Shrove Tuesday/Fat Tuesday/Pancake Day – whatever you call it – when we get our final chance to binge on goodies before officially enter Lent on Ash Wednesday. There’s Meatless Fridays. There’s that whole thing about giving up something that we really, really like as penance. And, then there’s the whole Easter Egg and Chocolate Bunny thing that I liked as a kid, but really can’t figure out as an adult.

I have different traditions. My traditions are based on 3 things: 1) God doesn’t want any of us to be hungry, 2) God wants all of us to be the best we can be, and 3) God has an awesome sense of humor. So, while I binge on “that” Tuesday, I don’t go meatless and I don’t give up anything. Instead, I look for opportunities to feed God’s people by keeping little bags of easily consumed food (pouches of tuna, pudding cups, fruit cups, etc.) in my car to give to the homeless standing on the corner as I drive home from work. I work on something I need to improve…patience has been a topic for years and each year, I think I get a little better at being patient, but I sure wish I could learn it quicker…and, yes, I see the irony here. And, lastly, I read Lamb – The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore.

I was introduced to the book and Christopher Moore by the pastor of my church. She knew me, my quirky sense of propriety, and my love of reading. She started what you might call an obsession with this book. I currently own six copies – a first edition, first printing hardbound; two editions of the “bible” version complete with pleather cover, gilt page edges, and satin ribbon; and three different editions of paperbacks. But, enough about me…back to Lamb…

In the Bible, we meet Christ as a baby, a small child, and a boy…and then he reappears years later  as an adult. What the heck happened during those “lost years”? Well, Lamb tries to explain all of that in a way only Christopher Moore and his quirky mind can.

We meet Christ – called Joshua or Josh for short in the book – at six with a lizard’s tail hanging out of His mouth. It’s part of a simple game he plays with his younger brother. It goes like this…Josh’s brother smites a lizard with a rock, lizard dies, Josh puts the lizard in His mouth, lizard comes back alive, and the cycle repeats. And, that my book friends, starts us on a whirlwind adventure that lets us get an insight in to what Christ’s life may have been like in those “lost years”.

Josh knows He’s the Messiah, but doesn’t know how to be one. They go to the prophet Hillel to find out what Josh needs to know and he sends them in search of the three Magi – Balthasar, Gaspar, and Melchior. This trip takes them to the mountains of Afghanistan, the Buddhist monasteries in China, to India and point in between. From Balthasar, Josh learns compassion, moderation, and humility…the three jewels of Tao and about justice that leads to turn the other cheek instead of an eye for an eye. From Gaspar, Josh learns about the oneness of everything leading “to love our neighbors as ourselves”. From Melchior, Josh learns how to multiply food leading to His ability to feed that the multitudes. There are many, many other lessons, but I don’t want to spoil the surprise for you. Even though I’ve read the book every year for 10+ years, I find new insights every year.

It’s not all about the lessons. Along the way, we meet interesting beings and …interesting in a way only Christopher Moore can create…Delicate Personage of Two Fu Dogs Wrestling Under a Blanket – one of Balthasar’s eight concubines; a yeti; Vana, the elephant, and Rumi – an Untouchable in India who lives in a pit of…well, we won’t go there…

I always save the last few chapters for Holy Week because Moore takes us all the way to the crucifixion. By the end of the book, I’ve laughed, I’ve cried, and I’ve discovered a little something more about me, Christ, and our relationship.

I highly recommend this book to everyone. But, I recommend it with some warnings. If you are a biblical literalist, this book is not for you. If you are offended by people poking fun at beliefs, this book is not for you. If you easily offended in general, this book is not for you. But, if you can approach this book with an open mind and heart, I guarantee you will have a wonderful time!